This year I am starting something new. My love of the fall has stood since childhood, when the fog of the Northern California summer clears, giving way to our glorious 1-2.5 month summer/fall. September and October give way to the crisp air of the fall and winter, and you can smell the ocean on the crisp breeze in the morning. All the magic of the upcoming holiday season begins to show on the Halloween front porches, and the pumpkin spiced lattes are drifting in the San Francisco air.
This year I have been flooded with creative ideas, yet instead of feeling joyful about this, I have experienced it as a sense of pressure. As I have shared with my inner circle, I see I am not alone in the feelings I am having and the hurdles I face. In my experience, I have been uplifted when I have shared my hardest struggles albeit uncomfortable. Truth is, we all experience very similar things, and sharing can offer others a new perspective or tool on how they might overcome their current struggles.
The Top Five Struggles We All Face
I am convinced these are the top five struggles we all face when starting something new, and how I manage them on my own with the help of tools insights from experts.
1. We All Face the Struggle of Overcoming Inertia* and Procrastination
*Inertia: in this blog, inertia refers to the tendency for people to remain in their current state or habits, even when a change would be beneficial. Inertia is the resistance to change or to doing something new, which can lead to procrastination and a lack of progress.
The biggest struggle we all face when starting something new or working toward a goal, is not a lack of willpower, but rather the inertia that keeps us stuck in our current patterns, as Hardy explains in his book, Willpower Doesn't Work . To break free from this inertia, Hardy recommends embracing "identity-based habits," where we align our actions with the person we aspire to become. By visualizing ourselves as the successful version of ourselves, we can cultivate the necessary motivation and discipline to take consistent action. To say this another way, Fake it till you make it. Dream Big- learn the actions that dream vision of you would take- and start doing them. Don't know where to start? Keep Reading!!!!!
2. We All Face the Struggle of Overcoming Fear and Self-Doubt
Starting something new can often trigger feelings of fear and self-doubt, as we face the unknown and question our abilities. Most of us know this as imposter syndrome. In his book, Personality Isn't Permanent Hardy emphasizes the importance of recognizing that our personality traits are not fixed, but rather malleable and responsive to our environment and choices. By adopting a growth mindset and challenging our limiting beliefs, "Why not me? Why is it ok to allow my fear to prevent me from sharing my gifts, or rare seeds, with the world? Who am I to stand in the way of my flowers being shared with the world?" we can overcome these self-doubts and embrace the opportunities that come with starting something new.
3. We All Face the Struggle of Overcoming Distractions and Maintaining Focus
In our fast-paced, digitally-driven world, it's easy to get sidetracked and lose focus on our goals. As Hardy advises in his book, 10x is Easier Than 2x it's often more effective to focus on ambitious, transformative goals rather than incremental ones. By setting our sights on a 10x goal, we can cultivate a greater sense of urgency and drive to overcome distractions and maintain focus. By minimizing distractions and cultivating a distraction-free environment, we can devote our mental resources to the tasks that truly matter. Cal Newport's concept of "deep work," as outlined in his book Digital Minimalism encourages us to create intentional periods of focused, uninterrupted work to maximize our productivity and progress.
I've used the Marie Forleo time management plan and am starting with the first step create before you consume to begin implementing the deep work Newport explains, and I run my creative ideas through the 10x filter...if the future me has an abundance of resources AND an abundance of time to share with my children, family, and community, to be creative, and to share my vision and joy with others, how do these daily goals, creative dreams, mental stories serve to create that future me, and, are the stories I hold about my past and my future limiting my opportunity to reach that 10x goal? In summary- Find your voice by committing to create every day BEFORE you consume. Shut off all your notifications, and set a routine of listening to your voice, and creating something with it everyday.
4. We All Face the Struggle of Overcoming Resistance from Others
When we embark on a new journey, we may face resistance or skepticism from friends, family, or even colleagues. Think of your dreams as rare seeds which exist only in your seed bank, and can only be brought to flower by your hands in your dirt in your garden. No one else has written the book on your seeds because they haven't been introduced to them yet. You are the only road map, and you haven't yet found your own way. While you can and should draw on the available resources around you to best bring this flower into the world, you must also remind yourself that only you can create this map, and therefore at some point, you must close yourself to outside input and create a place to start, a path to begin your journey on.
Don't overcomplicate this- you are just planting a seed that only you can nurture to realize its full beauty. And rather than see this as an insurmountable obstacle, just start somewhere- you can always stop and change direction, but if you don't start, in part because you allow others knowledge only of what has been to limit your trying, for sure the world will never see your beautiful flower, and perhaps that rare gift my go unshared. What's the worst that could happen if you try for that unattainable goal? Could you fail? Sure- and is that worse than never trying?
Hardy's theory of "identity-based decisions," as discussed in Personality Isn't Permanent encourages us to make decisions that align with our desired identity, rather than succumbing to external pressure. By staying true to our vision and maintaining a steadfast commitment to our goals, we can overcome the naysayers and forge our own path. If you are the kind of person who feels great need to have the input and advice from others, allow any negatives or doubts to be a list under problems to solve for success, rather than reasons to not try. And please don't take advice from people who haven't achieved something like you are aspiring to do- its a total waste of time and confidence suck.
5. We All Face the Struggle of Overcoming Burnout and Maintaining Motivation
It's easy to fall victim to burnout. Hardy's concept of "deliberate practice," as outlined in Willpower Doesn't Work emphasizes the importance of setting achievable, incremental goals and celebrating small victories along the way. Another way to think of this, in combination with the above 4 ideas, remember that likely when you are working toward a 10x goal, that "unachievable" goal, it won't come overnight. It will take self care and celebration, deliberate attention and time, and the bravery to not give up. You must breakdown your massive goal into increments, maybe even as small as 10 mins if you need, in order to digest it in a way that is sustainable for you to keep working. Celebrate your small steps, even if those are- I wrote for 10 mins today- each time you celebrate yourself you will add a bit more fuel to your tank. Just don't give up- and celebrate your small wins. By adopting this mindset and practicing self-care, we can sustain our motivation and avoid the pitfalls of burnout.
Remember, life is bound to give seasons of extreme discomfort. It's how we focus our attention within any trial that will be the difference between make or break. You can absolutely do and realize the things you dream of. Take yourself seriously- and share your gifts- you really should.
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